Walking Down Memory Lane with a Heart Full of Truth
“She remembered who she was and the game changed.” — Lalah Delia
Today, I found myself walking down memory lane—thinking about my childhood, my younger self, and everything in between.
Being the eldest daughter in the family comes with its own invisible weight. From an early age, I was expected to be the “responsible one.” I wasn’t allowed to make mistakes like others because I was the example. I was the “sanskaari” girl—well-behaved, helpful, always in control. My relatives praised me for knowing all the household chores, for helping my mother in the kitchen, and for being polite and obedient.
The funny thing is that no one forced me to be this way. But somewhere, society’s expectations crept in quietly and made a home in me. I lived the way others wanted me to—not because I had to, but because I thought I should. Somewhere along the way, I skipped a part of my childhood—the carefree, mistake-filled, joyful part.
Looking back now, I wonder: what did I become? What did I ever want?
As a kid, I was never into studies much, but I was full of life. I loved watching TV—cricket, films, actors—I knew it all. I was a true cinephile. My real love was in extracurriculars: dancing, drama, and sports.
Dancing especially—oh, how happy it made me. I felt alive, free, and full of joy every time I moved to music. But as life moved on, dreams got buried beneath responsibilities, routines, and the silent pressure of being “perfect.”
All through my life, I’ve been shy and underconfident. It’s always been hard for me to express my true feelings. I never really trusted myself—I doubted every step, every decision, and every thought. I always second-guessed the things I did, wondering if they were good enough.
But something shifted. I started working on myself—slowly, quietly, patiently. And while I still have a long way to go, I am better than before. I am learning to believe in myself, to speak my truth, and to live unapologetically. I am still a work in progress, but I’m finally moving in the direction of me.
Now, after so many years, I’ve stopped thinking about what people say. I do what I want. I’ve started listening to myself more. I don’t enjoy meaningless chit-chat anymore. I enjoy my own company.
People may call me arrogant or self-centred for that, but guess what? I don’t care. Because the truth is—everyone is here to live their own life, not to impress others.
So here I am, finally choosing me. Spending time with myself. Learning, unlearning, healing.
✨ My message to anyone reading this?
Don’t waste your life trying to fit in or live up to other people’s ideas of who you should be. Take time to know yourself. Do things that light you up. Be kind, help others—but above all, be content and at peace within.
Because only a happy soul can truly spread happiness in this world. 🌻
With love,
Anu🌼
Unfiltered thoughts by Anu 